May 3rd, 2011
I’ve become lost in my own reality. With all of the worldly events that have happened throughout my duration in Kenya, watching my fellow citizens celebrate the death of Osama Bin Laden has been one of great darkness. But deep down I know that if I had never gone to Kenya, if I had been resuming life at my own university, I probably would have been parading around campus, joining my colleagues, thinking that this death was glorious too. Over the past 24 hours I’ve scrolled through the thousands of Facebook statuses only to find three that exude opposition to this euphoria of death. I think my favorite was a quote by Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. "I mourn the loss of thousands of precious lives, but I will not rejoice in the death of one, not even an enemy. Returning hate for hate multiplies hate, adding deeper darkness to a night already devoid of stars. Darkness cannot drive out darkness: only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate: only love can do that."
I am no expert on politics or international affairs, and I am not trying to rag on or damper American pride, but living in Kenya for four months has given me perspective. You see, I used to think that politics were pointless. That it was just a bunch of suits all gussied up making false promises through those perfect, white smiles. Or better yet, arguing about rights, like abortion or marriage, stripping any opportunity of personal choice out of citizen’s hands. It was like politics stayed in its own corner, and I stayed in mine. Separate and content with the fact that I could just keep meandering through life without them coming out of their corner and altering my path. But it’s different here. Politics is everything. Every aspect of this country operates through the government, through politicians, through money.
And because politics in Kenya is everything, people pay attention to news more than any other culture I’ve ever been submerged in. Kenyans hover around their televisions at 9:00pm as the evening news flashes on KTN, and each morning every street corner is occupied with someone selling The Daily Nation, The Standard, or a local newspaper.
Since my time here is wrapping up, my colleagues and I have been spending time with each other’s host families, relishing the final home cooked, Kenyan meals of chapati, kachumbari, ugali, and nyama. Its funny cause each house we visit, the same questions are asked- “What are the differences that you see between America and Kenya? If you could change 10 things about Kenya, what would they be? What were your perceptions before you came to Kenya, and what do you think now? How far behind is Kenya?” Compare, contrast, explain…
Any one can point out the differences, well if you know anything different. See the trash on the side of the road, that’s normal. Before you can walk, when your strapped to your mama’s back by a colorful khanga, your round, and innocent eyes loom on the mounds of litter that collect on the sides of the road. It’s always been like this, so what’s wrong with it? I could go on, but then it would just be like a bitter vent session, or a repeat of a prior post.
But I guess what I am trying to say is that I think in order to find myself, I had to lose myself. Before I came to Kenya I was so certain about “everything”, that I had it all figured out, that because I had traveled to Africa twice, South America twice, and Latin America twice, I knew the world. Maybe I was more aware, but I had no formal education on worldly matters of community development and health. This experience has been a blessing, one of the greatest. I have discovered more than I thought about life here, and I know it is only the beginning of a long journey.
The other day I was watching “Eat, Pray, Love” with my roommates, since I now live in an apartment (apologies for my lack of updates). I had watched it just before I came to Kenya, and was excited to watch it again. So much of Elizabeth Gilbert’s finding herself is through travel and adventure, which just gives me such a spirit for life and much food for thought. Out of all of her “wisdom” this one quote has stuck with me that I would like to end with-
“In the end, I've come to believe in something I call "The Physics of the Quest." A force in nature governed by laws as real as the laws of gravity. The rule of Quest Physics goes something like this: If you're brave enough to leave behind everything familiar and comforting, which can be anything from your house to bitter, old resentments, and set out on a truth-seeking journey, either externally or internally, and if you are truly willing to regard everything that happens to you on that journey as a clue and if you accept everyone you meet along the way as a teacher and if you are prepared, most of all, to face and forgive some very difficult realities about yourself, then the truth will not be withheld from you.”
Until next time…
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